I tried to stay awake last night, but the night inevitably degenerated into weary time wasting, throwing darts at one another. Lee was a necessary distraction. I ended up going to bed at five.
My fast lasted less than twenty four hours. I had no commitment and I wasn’t possessed enough. The chaos and mess all around affected me mentally and I climbed into bed defeated and miserable. Glimpses of true conviction come weakly, if they come at all.
So today I had no recourse but to miss my tutorial again. Now we are all in trouble: I haven’t been to Ian Pugh’s seminar since 30th January and Barry and Pete are in the same boat as I am. It’s now after dark, and I’m going up to Stu’s to write that essay.
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