Sunday, October 25, 1981


A nightmarish dream: a decaying corpse by the side of a railway line, an old woman crawling across the floor of her darkened room and coming across the half-skeletal head of her husband, going on like that for ages, a succession of weird, jumbled images.

I finished reading On The Road and then, because I was at a loss (what’s new?), I started The Dharma Bums. I watched a repeat of Great Train Journeys Of The World about India, the one I saw last year, and I was once again smitten by the travel bug but see now how futile travel would be as a means to find what it is I'm searching for: the more I'd travel the more it would recede and the sadder and more suicidal I’d get.

There have been enormous CND demonstrations in Paris, Brussels, London and, surprisingly, East Berlin this weekend. What really infuriates me is seeing the jingoistic, destructive and predictable cartoons and comments in the Sunday Express. Cartoonist Cummings even depicted the marchers with hammer-and-sickle badges.

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